Category Archives: Homeschool

Not going to “normal school”

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Im so tired of all the “knowitalls” and having to defend our daughter not going to school. Its like they think we are keeping her home willy nilly for FUN just because we feel like it.

“She wont thank you for it”, “She needs to be with her friends or she will be socially awkward”, “its not good for them to be home”. The worst ones are the swedes (no offence meant, remember, I am a Swede), because homeschooling is not legal in Sweden they all seem to think of it as something worse then witchcraft and I am obviously damaging my child by not letting her go to school. What the doctors say doesn’t matter. Clearly.

Strange how as an adult its ok to not work and to be long term ill or signed off as disabled, but a child must go to school or you are ruining them for life. I have two words for them all. FUCK OFF. You know nothing. You don’t know us, you don’t know the struggles we face or have faced, you don’t know that your child’s sniffle could mean a lengthy hospital stay for us. You don’t know the amount of thinking, anguish and tears that have gone in to this decision, a decision which was finally taken away from us when the doctors put their foot down and said NO MORE!

We, as a family are having to come to terms with our daughter, our child, possibly never being able to attend what you call “normal” schooling. Nothing you say is news to us. We have taken it all in to consideration. We know how damaging it may be, we know. We have also done our research and we also know that most homeschooled kids are well adjusted awesome human beings. A high school teacher friend of mine said she has never met a previously homeschooled kid who was socially awkward or not up to speed academically.

We are not hippies who don’t believe in education. We are not weirdos who think the system is faulty. We are not deeply religious people who pray all day (maybe we should – perhaps it would help!). We don’t feel the need to carry a sign signed by our doctors (our team of doctors I may add) saying “She is to ILL for school”. We don’t owe you or the world anything. The minute you say you homeschool every Tom, Dick and Harry (and their cousins uncles neighbour) has to have an opinion? I mean seriously? GO AWAY!

Our 6 year old is a well adjusted, friendly, polite, non awkward life and soul of any party. We do not need your advice. Thank you.

Phew. Needed that vent.

And I said the F word. Bite me.

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Pinterest to the rescue!

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Feeling so much more positive about the homeschool / outschool situation. Had a positive meeting with school on Friday and then decided to browse Pinterest for homeschool stuff! Needless to say I already decorated the entire new school room in my head several times over by now!

Stress levels are slowly going down as well, plenty of rest and good food and just coming to terms with it all, so much to take in, and it takes a while to sink in.

Whatever will be will be, and I have accepted it. Really I have. We just have to take it one day at a time and see how we go along, and when I falter I will go and look at pinterest again. (!!) Check out my new and lovely homeschool board. So exiting. We move house in May and we have a large room ready to be the new school / chill / hang out room.

My shopping list and to do list is growing. 😀

Thank you all who commented and sent me private messages over my last few posts, your support means so much to me, to all of us.

-Linda

Yesterday my heart broke a little……

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We were sitting in school Celiac kid and me, waiting to pick up big brother. All of a sudden I realised she wont be back there, not just for ages, but ever. The school is building a new building, and if/when she does go back, it wont be there.

Its very different sitting in school knowing you can send her back any time you like because you took her out, just for a bit, to sitting in school knowing she cant go back for a year or 2 because the dr. said so. Even though its what my mummy heart has wanted and thought about for some time, the fact that we now have it on paper just seems so final.

The lumps in my throat got all big and horrible and for a horrible moment I thought I might cry. I didn’t. Thankfully, lucky none of my closer mum friends were there, because if one of them had asked how I was doing the floodgates would have opened.

Im ok, its for the best, and I know that. But there is still this huge sadness inside that soon A’s class wont be her class anymore, it will just be the class that she should have been in if she attended school. As new kids come and go, “her class” wont even know who she is anymore.

Onwards and upwards now with positivity. I am mourning but I should be celebrating, because we may be looking at a year or two with no pneumonias, and maybe even no hospital stays? Thats got to be a good thing, right? A year or two with mummy all to her self, a year or two of doing whatever she wants (within limits obviously). A year or two of me not stressing every time the phone rings (incase its school calling to tell me to come get her quick). A year or two with one on one teaching and learning!!

Bring it on, Im ready (or am I?…)

-Linda

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An unwilling homeschooler

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Yup. Not only am I one of those mums *insert eyeroll*, I am now also about to be one of THOSE mums *insert even bigger eyeroll*.

We are back from the lung hospital. We have the results from the immunologists. And guess what, there is nothing wrong with with our kid! (Apart from recurring pneumonias with low oxygen levels).

PCD, CF, back normal, no growths or foreign objects in the lung. No asthma although she may be heading that way. A couple of new allergies diagnosed. All immune levels are ok, some a bit low, but within the accepted range, some signs of autoimmune activity that needs to be followed up but thats it.

The doctors agree that its not normal to get so many severe pneumonias, and they agree the low oxygen levels that go along with it are also not normal, all our specialists were so sure they would find something, either in the lung or with her immune system, and I know I shouldn’t be disappointed, because obviously its great news that she’s ok and its not one of the big things, but I cant help but think that this isn’t over at all….

Oh, and there is a plan. Her pulmonologist and immunologist agree that she needs “time off”. A year off school I asked, and the reply was; “probably more like 2”.

I should be happy about this as well as my gut instinct has been telling me for a good year or two now to take her out of school so she can rest, but again, I feel cheated somehow, I wanted a better answer, an answer where we could actually DO something.

I know, it makes sense to have her rest and not be near other kids for a couple of years, if one pneumonia takes 6-12 months to get over she really does have her work cut out for her. But a diagnosis of ‘lots of bad luck and vicious circle and immune system that needs to mature etc’ just doesn’t sound very much like a real diagnosis to me.

One of her antibodies to pneumonia was a little low, but not so much, her overall igg is a bit on the low side but acceptable, the igg1 a bit on the low side but acceptable. FUCK acceptable. Acceptable doesn’t get us anywhere. What if we wait two years and then after that there is no change?

Now back on to the steroids also, yeah, the ones that make her not grow and suffer from bone pain. The ones that make her cry walking down the stairs, the ones that when she came off them she rapidly grew 3 cm!

Im so so tired.

On the bright side we have had doctors confirm she shouldn’t be in school and the paper work to support it. On the not so bright side I need to come up with a home schooling plan in a country where you are only allowed to home school in extreme cases and if so then it must be in Polish.

Anyway. Bla bla. Still sort of processing all this, and Im feeling positive, ish, but also not so much.

Deep breaths and all that.

-Linda