Things make so much sense in hindsight!

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Thinking back, of all those things, the days out, the screams in the car on the way home after having eaten Pizza, me in tears thinking ‘another family outing ruined, why do I bother’.

Is there any guilt? HELL YES! I feel guilty all the time, there I was, angry and upset and frustrated with her, and there SHE was, obviously (in hindsight) in PAIN and having a full on reaction.

Any trip in the car was a nightmare, I often had to use all my strength to force her in to her car seat, we had the back arching and the screaming. Funny now that I think of it, I used to give her biscuits to make the car rides easier… and the calm never lasted! I actually cringe at the thought now. POOR POOR girl! Again, this is why I do what I do. Because we just didn’t see it, we just thought we had a ‘very angry child’, we had no idea that she was ILL. We had never heard of Celiac disease. In some ways I feel we failed as parents, simply because we were not educated enough. Its every parents duty to know about ‘stuff’. It took for vomiting and diarrhoea to become so frequent we needed weekly IV’s for us to realise she wasn’t just an ‘angry kid’. In our defense, the doctors didnt spot it either. Our peadiatrician was always commenting about her big big stommach and skinny skinny arms and legs…..

Another DR in the ER SAW her stomach literally ballon up after eating (gluten) and told me to tell the paediatrician upstairs, but still no connection.

Obviously…. in hindsight…. its all as clear as glass!

Hope this blog may help someone else to not have to see these things in hindsight. With over 95% of Celiacs remaining un diagnosed I bet we all know at least ONE undiagnosed Celiac. Maybe your neighbour has an ‘angry kid’. Hit share, hit like, here or on other Celiac blogs posts, help us, the Celiac community, to reach other families like mine, maybe if we had had our diagnosis sooner things would not be the way they are today. Maybe we can prevent that happening to someone else.

Fingers crossed.

-Linda

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Having 3 way conversations.

My life lately goes something like this.

Me ‘Hi (BIG smile), do you speak English?

Person ‘little (while blushing and looking around a little bit panicked)’.

Im not sure why people get embarrassed, clearly the problem here is mine, Im the one in a foreign country that doesn’t speak the language (although Im picking it up, rather fast!). I must say, I have been fortunate to have some awesome people helping me. The lady in the line in the post office who helped me translate when the cashier spoke no English, the customer in the Orange shop who helped me translate. The manager in Piotr i Pawel who took his time to help me translate food labels today. Then we have the even more patient people who my hubby helps to translate to, the awesome lady in the Pesel number place who patiently helped me with forms and everything while hubby was being passed between us (on the phone, obviously). The doctor who got given A’s entire medical history first by me in english and then by hubby in Polish over the phone, who waited patiently while hubby translated all the dosages of new meds to me and made sure I understood. The NC+ installation guy who had the hubby on skype translating for us.

I zone in on the younger people now if I need to ask something, they are more likely to speak English well it seems, like the girl in H&M who has lived in London and who nearly made me cry with her perfect East End accent, the girl in the Mac shop who has studied in Cambridge and speaks the queens English almost as well as the Queen. These are the people I almost want to hug! Being understood is such a huge part of life, I never realised what a difference it can really make in how we feel.

So I struggle on, but more then anything, I am managing, thanks to awesome people in shops and a very patient husband.

And then there is my new book…..

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-Linda

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Cabbage, Potato and ehm….. more cabbage..?

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Perhaps Im spoiled. Having lived in Dubai for 8 years Im used to seeing a huge variety of foods in the supermarkets. I remember shopping in Dubai after I had just arrived, seeing so many different fruits and vegetables, some I had never seen before. Spiky pink things, funny shaped oval yellow things etc etc. It was an adventure learning to cook with some and trying all the ones I was brave enough to try! Dubai supermarkets will have an abundance of things from America, Australia, Europe, Uk, Asia. Yes sure, we complain when things go out of stock, but bottom line, we are spoiled for choice in Dubai. Meat is flown in, great quality lamb, beef, fish, chicken, turkey and even pork in selected shops! The cereal aisle has so many brands you couldnt count them! Even in the smaller shops!

And now, here I am, in Poland. The first few supermarkets I went to I couldnt quiet put my finger on what it was, everything seems the same as anywhere else. Then after a few shops I realised what it was! Even though the shops might be big and the sections are big, its all a repeat of the same stuff over and over. In my local supermarket in Dubai there would be no less then 8 different brands of apples, all from different parts of the world, in my local supermarket here, the apple section may be almost the same size, but its all just one or two kinds of apple. Same thing in the veggie section. Where I used to have a great choice of onions, red, white, brown, organic brown, indian red, American red, shallots etc. Here. There is just one kind. Go to any section, and its similar. Rice section, a handful of brands, cereal section, again, a handful. The fruits and veg are very seasonal. Cabbage, carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, onion, leek, potato. Apples, Bananas, clementines. The more high end places have more. You might even find avocado in some. 

Actually….. I started this post with ‘perhaps Im spoiled’, I realise now that I am. You get used to going to the supermarket and picking whatever you like based on what you like, not based on what they have. Meat here is chicken, chicken, more chicken, turkey, pork, pork, more pork, and then sausages and pates in every shape imaginable, most not ok for us as few are gluten free. Beef and lamb is around of course (although so far I have not seen any lamb), but I dont understand the labels and I dont recognise the cuts, obviously this is my problem, not the supermarkets fault.

I find myself not really knowing what to eat. Its strange, because of course there is plenty of food in the shops, but its just not at all what Im used to. I guess I need to try to cook more with whats there instead of walking around looking for what Im used to. Even gluten free is hard to come by, even though this is Europe.  Actually, I shouldn’t say hard, it was hard, for the first few weeks, now that I know the shops and I know where to go, its not so bad, but it wasn’t as readily available as I had expected. 

My week used to be so easy, meal plan wise lamb 1-2 times, seafood 1 time, beef once, pasta once, 1 leftover day and a veggie day. It was rare we had chicken. Now its all chicken. I need to be more prepared I guess. Buy the good stuff in advance and freeze, find myself a local butcher perhaps.

I hope this post doesn’t come across as whiny and depressing, I don’t mean for it to sound that way at all. Im more surprised then anything. Im embracing it, slowly, today we boiled cabbage in chicken stock as a side for dinner, kids loved it! And food here, is cheap! I mean, really really cheap. Tomatoes that we pay over 20dhs per kilo for in Dubai are sold here (same brand, from same country) for 1.80dhs per kilo. Im guessing my carbon footprint is also happy (ecstatic probably). I mean hello, it rained enough in the last week to turn the desert green 4 times over! 

Now, if you’ll all forgive me, I must go and google ‘leftover cabbage recipes’, perhaps you have one to share? Who knew 1dhs worth of cabbage would go that far??

-Linda

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3 weeks in school and only 1 sick day!

So little miss has had a cough, a sniffly snotty nose, then a pretty bad cough which scared me half to death as she was doing her rapid breathing wheezy thing that usually ends in a hospital stay, and then got better – ALL ON HER OWN!! And no temps, at all!!? This doesn’t happen. Fluke..? Perhaps, but all I can say is GO IMMUNE SYSTEM 😀

Just had to share the good news as I know many of you are wondering. Keep those fingers crossed!

-Linda

Touch wood and all that, but so far so good.

Contamination, what happens?

Just like all Celiacs are different, so are everyones reactions. There are 200-300 (depending where you read!) documented symptoms relating to Celiac. Very often we talk about what happens if a Celiac eats gluten, but what about contamination, not really so much from eating, but from the environment or contamination somehow in the kitchen?

Yesterday I picked up a grumpy child from school. She told me her tummy had hurt during the day. Knowing what this means I was instantly ‘on my guard’. When she’s been contaminated we walk on eggshells…. We got home, there was some wind. Hey, this is a gluten free blog discussing celiac, so Im just going to say it, there was farting. I call the farts gluten farts. See, there is normal farting and there is contamination farting. The contamination one is sometimes deadly. You smell it in the car and know you got to get home QUICK, because soon the pain and crying could start. OR, like yesterday, its not so much the smell, but the amount of actual air! My tiny 4 and a half year old can do farts that last like 5 seconds! Then she laughs, and blames her brother, or daddy, or the dogs. Then she does another, and another. I guess the bloating has to come out some way. When you are 4 and a half, long loud farts are pretty cool. Not so much when you are a teen I guess!

Then there is the reason we walk on eggshells. Her mood. The smallest thing can make her angry or upset. From angry, we have a very very thin line, if crossed we have a tantrum. This is not a normal tantrum though, this is a gluten tantrum, and in a gluten tantrum no telling off, pleading, time outing, or reasoning will make any. difference. whatsoever. There is a reaction in her brain, its something she can not control. You just have to reel in all those feelings that you yourself feel, bite your tongue and try to be as nice as you possibly can, preferably before the line is crossed and the tantrum comes. You can discipline bad behaviour, but you cant discipline a reaction in the brain! Im not even sure of all the ins and outs of what happens in the brain, but I asked some of my adult Celiac friends who also suffer emotionally when contaminated. Linsey says she feels so emotional she cant help but cry. Once she said she felt so down all she wanted to do was hurl herself out of a window. Mel the same, she called me in tears one day and said, ‘if this is how A feels, then please go easy on her, because I cant stop the tears’! Because how, if an adult feels like that, can we expect a 4 year old to understand whats going on and try to ‘be nicer’? Remember, we are talking about contamination here, not eating something with gluten ‘on purpose’, if A or Linsey or Mel ate something with gluten in it the reaction would be far far worse.

This morning the mood continued. She didn’t want to put her jacket on, she wanted help, then there were endless tears, endless. I know my girl, and most of the time I know which is gluten behaviour and which is not, but its hard to parent a child like A when she’s been contaminated. Its also hard to try to explain to the sibling why sometimes the celiac kid may not get a time out when at other times she would. Sometimes I get it wrong, sometimes I think she’s just being a stubborn 4 year old when in fact she is having a reaction. All you can do is try your best, and dish out extra cuddles as often as possible.

So what happened yesterday? Why was she unwell? She eats only food from home, her table is wiped down by adults before she sits. Who knows, there could have been a crumb somewhere, maybe she held hands with a gluten eating kid that hadn’t washed properly, maybe she stuck her fingers in her mouth. Maybe it was the yogurt that she had eaten the night before, because although usually A’s reactions start within 30 minutes or so, they don’t always. These things happen, they will happen from time to time, all we can do is try as hard as we can to prevent it. There is no blame here. I mentioned it to the teacher this morning, but that was that. No matter how hard you try, sometimes it just happens anyway.

So the next time you see me with my hand wipes cleaning the shopping trolley handle or the table in a cafe or my child’s hands, please, spare me the eye roll and mind your own business, this is what we do, to try our best to keep our girl healthy. And no, a little bit of exposure will NOT make her stronger.

-Linda

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Just a small add here, please remember, that even for a celiac who doesn’t react as strongly as A does, there could still be damage on the inside after being exposed, so when we prepare foods for a Celiac there is no ‘how sensitive are you?’ coming in to the equation. We need to be 100% strict no matter what.

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Who needs an oven? Cake in 5 minutes!

There I was stressing about the cake, ran around several shops yesterday morning to try to get a whisk, a mini chopper, essentials you know. But in the end, the cake became a trusted old ice cream cake made with nothing other then a spoon and a hand whisk using 2 ingredients! Sure, it may not have been super stunning (although the kids thought it was) but it sure was super delicious!

So heres a recipe for you. You need;

  • 1 tub of ice cream (I used chocolate chip)
  • whipping cream
  • decorations

You need to;

  • Spoon ice cream on to a plate or tray, you have to work fast so it doesn’t melt to much. Mould it in to some kind of shape. I wanted round so round it was.
  • Carefully spread your whipped cream on top, and cover the whole thing. If you know how to make it pretty, by all means, go ahead 😉
  • Decorate with berries or sweets or even gluten free Oreos!

Pop the ‘cake’ in the freezer for at least 10 minutes to harden a little. Don’t go crazy or the cream gets very hard.

TADAAA!!

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Another birthday taken care of, who needs super pretty when its super yum?

-Linda

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Another birthday and Im not ready!!!!

Tomorrow big brother turns 7, can you believe I have a 7 year old son? I certainly cant! Im very exited for him because I know his present will make him super chuffed, but Im stressing about the cake! I have yet to fill my baking equipment cupboard, I don’t have my trusted machines, and I don’t recognise any of the products in the shops! I need a mini chopper, a whisk, tins and pans and baking powder thats certified gluten free and yeast and BREAAAATHEE!!! There is no way I will find any of those things by tomorrow. I need to order most of it from amazon and last time I checked they didn’t deliver that fast. Wish I had been more organised.

So, 2 options then, Swedish chocolate sticky cake or ice cream cake (home made). I just so desperately don’t want my super kid to be disappointed, its hard enough being in a new country and not having any friends yet to invite to a party!

Any ideas for a cake rescue? Gluten free obviously?

-Linda

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